38 Weeks: Happy New Year

Happy New Year!

This is the first New Years Day in a long time that I woke up and was ready to go at 8 am.  Funny how sober living will do that to a girl. 

I even met up with a friend to go to the farmers market and breakfast.  Before noon. 

Unfortunately, the farmers market wasn't open today. 

Oh well, breakfast was FANTASTIC!

Today I am 38 weeks pregnant and CANNOT WAIT to get this baby out of me.  I'm just tired of being fat and unable to do so many things.  Belive it or not, I am incredibly jealous of the people who are starting the year off with a run or a long bike ride.  I would absolutely kill to be able to hop on my bike today or take Daisy Dog for a run. 

I might almost be craving a run more than I am craving champagne. 

I said almost.

Unfortunately, a Wednesday's checkup, the midwife told me that an early birth looks highly unlikely.  I'm 50% effaced, but Bug hasn't dropped and there is no dialation happening.  Grrr.  She said to expect Bug right around my due date (the 15th) and possibly a little after.

The midwife also told me that Bug is approximately seven and a half pounds.  That's not a fetus, that's a baby.  A baby that is still cooking and getting bigger by the day. 

DH is thrilled.  Since we missed the deadline for the tax write off, his new goal is for us to have a 10 pound baby. 

I kind of hate him right now.

Bug also kicked and punched at the midwife while she was examining me.  This is the second appointment in a row where this has happened. 

Also this week, DH made the terrible mistake of replacing my broken down, hardly working crackberry with a new droid something or other.  That means that I now have a camera on my phone that will actually upload pictures.  So here is a picture of my tummy, from my point of view. 

I assure you this t-shirt used to be much less stretched.

This is definitely going to be a crazy year.

Under Construction

As my many many (4) followers may notice... there are suddenly a lot more posts around.  I am finally getting around to importing the posts from my first and second trimester from my old blog.  My old blog was more of a teaching blog, and no longer seemed like the appropriate place for these posts.  Plus, my sister's husband found me making my blog no longer anonymous which is vital if you plan on bitching about your family, job, etc.

Feel free to poke around.  Some exciting stuff has happened in the last 6 months we:

• got knocked up.
• decided we should probably hurry up and get married and made the mistake decision to invite people.
• got an ultrasound the revealed that Carlos, I mean Bug, is a girl.
• found out that there is a person inside of me... not just gas.

Enjoy!

Book Review: Baby Catcher

Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife By Peggy Vincent

My baby sister has been reading almost as many baby books as I have since she found out about my pregnancy. Like me, she's an amazon junkie and takes reader reviews seriously. So when she saw Peggy Vincent's Baby Catcher and its rave reviews, she couldn't pass it up. Agreeing completely with the reviewers, passed it my direction, but not before making a few notes in the table of contents.

A few reviewers warned that this book is not for pregnant women. Bad things can happen during childbirth, and Vincent does include two such stories in her book. Worried that it might freak me out, sis inked a little sad face on any chapter that included anything sad. She also rated each chapter so that I'd make sure to read the best chapters if I ran short on time.  (Did I mention my sisters have been freaking awesome?)

I read the book, in its entirety, even the sad parts, because, despite being an exhausted mushy-minded pregnant zombie lady, I couldn't put it down. Vincent does an exceptional job of illustrating that, although there really is no such thing as a normal birth, childbirth is a natural process that woman are more than capable of accomplishing without medical intervention. Many of these stories are highly motivational and provided me with more confidence that I am will somehow to be able to make it through labor and delivery. And, frankly, I fear for the women who said this book is too scary for pregnant women. I think most women are aware that complications can happen and won't completely shatter because they read about it.

For the non-expectant, this book was an exceptional account of the midwifery and the world of home birth. I also provided an insider's look at how medical practices have evolved.

Despite my overall satisfaction with the book I do have one minor complaint. Vincent's depiction of hospitals is almost entirely negative. In the first chapter of the book she tells stories of women being strapped down and heavily medicated to the point where their birth experience can be described as nothing short of torture. She ends the book, and her career, practicing once again in a hospital and leads readers to believe that, though women are no longer being tied down, they are still being severely mistreated in this setting. I was surprised and a little put off by the tone in which she ended the book.

Overall, I would give this book a 4 out of 5 and would highly recommend it for anyone interested in reading inspirational birth stories.

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Top Ten Thing I Wish I Would Have Known: First Trimester

In the last few weeks, a handful of friends have found themselves knocked up.  As was I, most are panicking as pregnancy has gone from being a wish to a reality.  I don't envy them at all.  I absolutely hated the entire first trimester of my pregnancy. 

The following is a list of things that I wish I would have known before I got myself knocked up.  They are all things that I really should have known, in hindsight.  But when you are thinking about having a baby, you aren't thinking about the crappy stuff.  You are thinking about giggles and cuddles and cute little baby socks.   I assure you, the first trimester has none of that fun stuff.

1. Early pregnancy feels a lot like the worst PMS ever.  I swear, I was absolutely positive that I would start my period at any second because I was a crazed hormonal bitch complete with crying and cramping and bloating.  I had terrible PMS as a teenager, and have been on birth control since, so I kind of thought that this was a symptom of being of the pill, rather than a sign of early pregnancy.  Nope.  I was so terribly grouchy and crampy that I even partook in a few glasses of wine the weekend before I found out, something which is definitely haunting.
2. Your body really doesn't need time to get the pill out of its system.  I got my BFP about 6 weeks after I stopped taking birth control.  I was pretty sure that I'd messed something up and it would take me forever to get pregnant because I'd been on the pill for so long.  Nope.  (BTW, I will never ever ever ever miss a pill!)
3. You don't have to be ovulating to get knocked up.  Confused?!?! Let me clarify.  Because I was so convinced that there was no way I could be ovulating so soon after stopping birth control, I started doing the daily pee sticks to find out if I was in fact ovulating.  DH and I had decided to stop trying to prevent pregnancy, but we weren't going to get all crazy about getting knocked up either.  We had sex the day before ovulation, not during, which I now know is a very good way of getting knocked up.
4. Its common to have a meltdown instead of being happy when you get your BFP.  I felt terrible for a long time that I was so miserable when I found out I was pregnant.  I felt overwhelmed.  And I felt like I was giving up my freedom.  Well duh.  I knew that going in, and still decided to have a baby, and still was upset about it when  I found out.  Since then, many friends have told me that they felt the same way.   I think it must have more than a little to do with the flood of hormones you experience, and, lets be honest, its an overwhelming experience.
5. Morning sickness is a complete misnomer.  Before I got myself knocked up, I pictured morning sickness to be kind of like it is in the movies.  I figured I'd go about my day until I felt suddenly ill, I'd puke and that would be the end of that.  Bullshit! I was nauseous all day, every day, from the moment I woke up, to the moment I fell asleep.  And I was dizzy all the time.  I pretty much just wanted to die from about 5 to 13 weeks.  But no vomit.  Nope.  None.  I even tried to make myself puke a few times, and nothing.   
6. Maintaining a healthy diet is much much harder than I thought it would be.  Because of the nausea, eating was incredibly difficult.  One would think this would prevent me from gaining tons of weight early on, but it had just the opposite effect.  I couldn't eat meat (or even smell it for that matter), or veggies without wanting to die.  Pretty much all I could stomach was fruit, sourdough bread by the loaf, and sugary foods (ice cream, doughnuts, an entire pack of chips ahoy cookies).  I don't normally even like sweets, but I couldn't put them down.  Forget about the all organic diet I had planned on following.  It was all crap, all the time.
7. Everything stinks.  Meat. Chinese food. Students.  Perfume. Cigarette smoke made me want to die.  And you can't tell anyone that you are being tortured by this new, overwhelming sense of smell because then they will totally know you are knocked up.  Suffering in silence doesn't help.
8. You will have to pee all of the time.  I had no idea that a baby no bigger than a pea could make me pee so much.  The first and third trimesters are the worst, and let me explain why.  As you can see in this ultrasound your uterus and bladder are next door neighbors.  Even this tiny change in size causes pressure on your bladder, increasing the number of times you have to go.  My doc explained that at some point early in the 2nd trimester, your uterus kind of pops over the top of your bladder, providing some relief until baby is significantly bigger.   

9. Everything makes you cramp.  Having to pee.  Having to poop.  Having gas.  Having sex.  Having an orgasm.  Sneezing.  All of a sudden, you'll feel like you are starting your period.  This made me constantly worry that the baby was going to fall out.  It didn't.
10. Did I mention that you will be a raving lunatic?  Though DH will disagree, my mood swings have subsided quite a bit since the first trimester.  Most of the time, I was pretty sure I hated him and I was trapped in a terrible relationship that I would have to now stay in because I was having this baby.  And there was crying.  Lots and lots of crying.  One time I cried because I couldn't eat anything except for PF Chang's, including anything from the countless similar places closer to home.  I felt bad making DH go get it for me, so I didn't eat.  And I then I cried about it.  Not just a little.  A lot.  Sobbing.  Hysterical.  To the point that I couldn't breathe.  DH pleaded with me to just let him go get me the damn food.  He would have gone anywhere at that point.  But nope, that made me cry more.  The worst part is that you know how crazy you are, but you just can't do anything about it. 

If you still want to have children, you are a braver woman than I.  I don't think I ever want to go through that again, but I'll tell you if its worth it after Bug makes her appearance.  Hopefully she'll be neat freak and clean up after me as soon as she can walk.  She'll later become a wealthy lawyer so that she can support mommy and her love of expensive cabernet savignon.  Then, maybe it'll be worth it. 

Luckily, like clockwork, right at about 13 weeks, it all got better.  The sun was shining, birds were chirping and I didn't want to stab DH anymore.  There is a light at the end of the tunnel.   And soon you will forget just how terrible early pregnancy can be. 

But for now, you have been warned.

37 Weeks~ Merry Christmas

I'm writing this post early, because I'm hitting the 37 week mark on Christmas day.  Its actually Christmas eve right now and I'm frantically getting ready to head down to my parent's house with DH and Daisy dog.  This will, no doubt, be a harrowing experience because 1) My parents have Boo, a pit-chow mix who is EXTREMELY dog agressive.  They also have a pug-chihuahua mix that Boo has eaten twice and spit out.  The little dog now must wear full armor if the two of them are to be around food.   2) Daisy has a melt down whenever she is more than a foot away from me if we are in a strange place.  She will likely need to be crated to avoid the likes of Boo, and she will not be happy about this.  Commence the whining of a lab and howling of a husky. 

Daisy is showing signs of neglect this week.  She was already re-decorating our yard by pulling up weed control fabric that we have under our rocks, broken an orange tree, and helped the Dashunds that live in back of us dig their way into our yard.  Her latest distructive behavior is to actually start eating away at the fence.  Poor puppy is missing the days when mommy could take her for a nice long run.  Now, daddy is still fully capable, but keeps bitching and moaning about how he has too much to do.  I've been off for a whole week now (so thankful for winter break) so I'm hoping she'll be a little more content.

I am feeling the effects of the third trimester big time.  I AM SO FREAKING TIRED!  After making tamales with my family on Saturday, I was completely and totally wiped out.  I spent most of Sunday and Monday sleeping.  My to do list is almost as long as it was when I started the week, and I still haven't finished the thank you cards for my baby shower which was on the fourth.  I know, I'm terrible.

Here's a few fun and exciting things that happened this week:

• Strep B culture came back negative!  Woohooh!  This is most fantastic because I'm hoping to get away with only an IV plug during delivery.  I'll fill you in more on the birth plan later (if I make it that far), but the tentative plan is to go au natural.  The rest of the plan is mainly to wait an see how it goes.
• I got a SUPER hot fireman to put in Bug's carseat.  We found out in our newborn prep class that 90% of carseat are installed incorrectly, and that most firestations have someone who is trained to put them in and they do it for free.  SWEET!  I'm all for safety and pretty firemen.  It is, however, very strange to have a baby seat in my car.
• Bug is FULL TERM!  We made it!  Though its still 3 weeks until our official due date, she can now come any time. 

Pregnant Dreams

This is something somebody should tell you about before you get pregnant: You will have the most insane dreams of your life.  For me, its been enough for me to want to check myself into the looney bin more than once.

A few nights ago, I hit the bizzare dream trifecta. 

During the first, DH and I were staying in a wierd little B & B with 4 rooms upstairs and a large room downstairs.  In my dream, I woke up in the middle of the night hungry so I went down to get something to eat.  One of my students, not one of my fav's either, came out from the room next to ours.  She looked exactly like this student, but had an interesting hair cut a la Cheri Oteri in Liar Liar.  She began bitching about a low grade and, in order to get me back, she cut off her own head and screamed that I had done it.  My student, now just a head, bounced around on the counter screaming that I'd cut off her head.  I didn't want to be accused, so I dumped a bucket of water on her head to shut her up, making me look so much more guilty.  The screaming woke up the other occupants, a stipper in room number 3 and an arguing couple in room four.  Not to be outdone, the man in room number 4 dumped his wife over the ledge, killing her.  He also held a gun and threatened that anyone who called 911 would be shot.  The only thing I could think of was that this would probably get me off of the hook for the headless student thing.

Waking up from that dream was a head scratcher, and after one of my many trips to the bathroom, I decided to try to go back to sleep.  After many tosses and turns and grumbles from DH, I fell asleep, only to have bizzare dream #2. 

In this dream, I was a hardened gang member on the streets of Santa Cruz.  For anyone who has never been to Santa Cruz, you should know that aside from a few drunken students and crazy homeless people the gang problem is minimal, at worst.  You probably know it better for the boarwalk.

Well, me and my hommies, dressed in pink jackets (including the fellas) looking more like the pink ladies from Grease than gang members, were in an all out battle for turf.  We were in a hot and heavy shoot out, when one of my pink guys got hit.  It was my job to provide cover fire while they took him to the hospital.

Insane in the membrane, I know.  Another trip to the bathroom and back to bed. 

The last dream was at least one that is common to the preggo ladies, so it made me feel a little less crazy.  I was at my mom's house and there was some kind of a party happening.  I saw a baby hanging out in the carseat on my mom's kitchen table.  My sister was playing with her and she happy and giggly and smiling.  I was just thinking, "I wonder who's baby that is?" when someone flipped on the music.   The baby immediately came to life, dancing in her carseat, rocking her fists.  Then I remembered all the times I was in my car, driving home from work when I switched from NPR to some kind of music station and my belly started shaking.  Bug is a notorious dancer already and without fail, will begin "dancing" in my belly at even a hint of music.  At this realization, I thought "Thats my Bug!".

That was my first Bug sighting, thought I've heard mom's say that they have recurring dreams starring their babies.  This dream was much happier, and left me far less puzzled than the other two.  DH wasn't as excited when I told him, especially because it was about 5:30 am when I woke up from this one.   

So make me feel better....what was your craziest preggo dream?  Did you ever get the chance to meet your LO in a dream?

How Daddy Proposed

It's been a year since Daddy proposed to mommy.  It feels like a long time ago because so much as happened.  Mommy and daddy decided it was time to try to make you, and daddy was we were so excited to find out you were coming. Mommy and Daddy had a shotgun beautiful wedding and they were so annoyed happy because everyone invited themselves decided to come.  Now, we are just waiting for you to make our lives complete.

Last year, Mommy was pretty sure that Daddy was going to ask her to marry him because she'd given him until the end of the year to propose before she told him she was going to leave him it was almost exactly 4 years from their first date.  Daddy was taking mommy to Napa for the weekend because Mommy likes to drink a lot of wine it's very pretty there.  After checking into our hotel, Mommy and Daddy went from winery to winery place to place drinking steadily because Daddy figured he'd have a better chance of getting a yes if Mommy was drunk looking at the beautiful scenery.

Then we got to Mumm, one of Mommy's favorite places because the only thing Mommy likes more than wine is wine with bubbles in it. it is the prettiest. Daddy asked mommy to take a walk through the art gallery and he was acting very nervous. 

They walked back and forth and looked at all of the crappy modern art pretty pictures until they go to the end of the hall that overlooked the vineyard.  It was a very pretty spot that looked over the vineyard and the tasting room.  In fact, it was so pretty that Daddy kept getting interrupted by drunk bitches at a bachelorette party nice ladies that kept asking him to take their picture. 

Finally, Mommy and Daddy were alone and daddy pulled out a beautiful ring and told Mommy she was his best friend and asked if she'd be his friend forever.  Of course, mommy said yes.  But not before another stupid bitch, too drunk to notice she was interrupting, asked to have her picture taken.